Friday, April 1, 2011


As of late I have really enjoyed the footage being aired on the television, of two identical twin babies involved, in what appears to be, a lively discussion of the state of their universe. They are delightful to watch as you see the give and take of their conversational babble, as well as the appropriate eye contact that they make with each other. This has led to another lively debate, this one between everyone who watches the video, on whether or not identical twins have some innate means of communicating with one another. My vote is a definite yes!
As the mother of four daughters, two of whom are identical twins and all of whom are extraordinarily close, I have always delighted in observing the special bond and understanding that has existed exclusively between my twins. It is a bond that, despite the closeness of all my girls, is different from the ones they share with their other sisters and the rest of the family. Just like the babies in the video my twins engaged in lively banter with each other from a the moment they made their first sounds. My other daughters would wake up in the morning or after naps and inevitably, after a few minutes of attempting to amuse themselves, begin to cry if no one came in to rescue them from their solitary world; not so with my twins. Their mornings and after-nap times were always filled with lengthy periods of contented chatter, which I would oftentimes observe, unnoticed, from a distance. The exchange between the two never failed to delight me and everyone else who viewed it, because it was clear to us, that although we had no idea what they were talking about, Gina and Jamie obviously, understood each other perfectly.
It isn't just their "twin-speak" alone though, that assures me that there is something shared by identical twins that the rest of us singletons will never be lucky enough to experience. The 24 years that I have watched them interact together are filled with innumerable examples of an understanding that exists solely between the two of them. It is something that not only defies explanation, but has also caused me great amusement. I can recall, like yesterday, a time when they were about five years old and Gina needed to have some blood work done. As I was escorting her into the room to have her blood drawn, a kindly nurse took notice of her twin sister, Jamie, and suggested that she could come along with us, in order to provide Gina with some moral support. From about four feet away, Jamie stood gazing at her sister, as another nurse prepared to draw Gina's blood. All of us were astonished when, at the exact second the needle was inserted in Gina's arm, Gina sat in silence, but Jamie said, "Ouch." The nurses were so amazed that they called numerous members of the staff to come in to show them the twins, and regale them with the story.
Far more times than I could mention, I have listened to stories from the girl's friends, as they marveled at how the twins not only would finish sentences for each other, but also how, when they attended the same classes but at different times of the day, would discover that they each had, without the other being aware of it, asked the teacher the same exact question while attending their separate classes. Oftentimes though, it isn't what is said, but what can be left unsaid, that assures me of the extraordinary connection between them. Their relationship is unfettered by the constraints experienced by the rest of us mere mortals, such as the need to voice our hopes or disappointments. They intuitively understand the emotions the other is experiencing; needing nary a word to pass between them. They support one another with just the right dose of comfort or amusement, to soothe a flagging spirit in a way the rest of us can only wish we could.
I certainly don't think though, that because they are identical twins that means they are "exactly alike." Gina and Jamie are as strongly independent and as different from each other as are their other two sisters; in both their manner, as well as their aspirations. They are uniquely themselves, while still maintaining a closeness the rest of us will never have. Over the years I have witnessed some other amazing perks they benefit from, as well. I remember once, for example, after a long day of shopping, when one of them was too tired to try on an outfit, but didn't want to purchase it without knowing what it would look like on her.
"Here. " she said, handing the outfit to her twin. "Try this on for me, so I can see what I look like in it."
Sigh....I HATE trying on makes me wish I had a twin sister!!!!!


  1. I love the titles you come up with for your
    This was very endearing indeed!
    From another "singleton", with love, Barbara

  2. I love your writing! Your girls and you are all gorgeous. I will see if I can post this...haven't been able to before because I always got the security thing wrong, LOL.
    Karen Sebastian