Friday, May 13, 2011


Today I decided to go to the laundry mat.  Quite a bit of laundry has accumulated around the house as I have been neglecting to do it, while laboring in my flooded basement.  I am not sure why there so much to wash, since Dave and Olivia have both clearly stated that none of the dirty clothes belong to them. It looks like it is their clothes, but obviously, they are not the individuals wearing them.  I am left to draw the conclusion that those rascally pups, Teddy and Scarlett, have been conspiring with Copper Cat to play a prank on me.  I  can see the three of them now,  creeping through the house, late at night, working together to quietly open all the drawers and closet doors, and then, while clutching the clean clothes in their teeth, sneaking carefully back to the laundry room to add them to the growing pile.  Then, I can visualize the three of them going into the living room and all rolling on their backs, while quietly laughing; delighted with each other, as well as their amusing antics. 
In any case, my washing machine has been acting persnickety lately, (I realize now as I write this that the machine is probably a part of the aforementioned conspiracy), and periodically, it will not properly drain the water after the rinse cycle.  This forces me to have to occasionally, wring the clothes out by hand, which, since I am presently on medical leave due to a problem with my neck, right arm and hand, is very painful, in addition to being very annoying.  That being said, I decided to bundle up all the clothes and venture off to the laundry mat.  After packing 6 large black garbage bags of clothes, assorted laundry products, two books, hangers, and a bottle of water, I was on my way.
I stopped at the bank to get some currency for the money changer, and it is a very good thing I did so.  The cheapest washing machine available is two dollars a load, and the dryers operate for 8 minutes for a quarter.  (I am strongly considering investing in my own laundry mat, as it appears to be a very profitable venture.) I unloaded the considerable  baggage from my car, and was greeted with curiosity by the other customers present.  Undaunted, I exchanged my first $15 of currency for quarters and proceeded to place the seven loads of clothes, that didn't belong to Dave or Olivia, into the washing machines.  When I had finished loading I happily picked up my book to read, but first, glanced at the machine I had initially loaded to see how much time I had left before the load was finished.  It read 2 minutes.  The eighteen minutes it took to wash a load of clothes had gone by quite a bit faster than I had anticipated.  I went back to the change machine and got 10 more dollars in quarters.  While I waited for it to process the change I perused the signs that were posted in the vicinity.  "Washers have EXTREMELY HOT WATER.  Use care!"  Then, I noticed something about machine #19 and #20, but by then my change was ready, so I didn't finish reading it. 
I began the lengthy process of switching the clothes from the washers to the dryers, and then starting them after picking the appropriate dry cycles.  Suddenly, there was silence; dead silence. 
I looked around at the other customer's puzzled expressions as we attempted to ascertain what had just happened.  No one spoke a solitary word, and since every single washer and dryer had simultaneously stopped working, it was very, very quiet.
Finally, since it was clear that someone needed to say something, I spoke up.
"Hmmmm."  I said,  "I didn't see this one coming.  My washing machine isn't working right, so I brought all my clothes to the laundry mat, and now it isn't working right either.  I know I had a lot of clothes, but  still...."
An elderly woman who shared my sense of humor said, "Yes, that was pretty inconsiderate of you.  You broke ALL the machines, instead of just one."
Just then, an employee walked out and asked what had happened.
"This lady broke the laundry mat."  the elderly woman happily informed her.
The employee began to look at me with her eyes narrowed, and an expression that did not convey any amusement at the comment.
"Ahhhh....Just kidding."  I said.   " I really don't know why your laundry mat is broken, but I feel confident that I am not the one who did it," I added uneasily...even though, whenever something breaks it is USUALLY because I did it. 
Just then another woman, an angel really, said,   "No, no...this woman didn't break the laundry mat.  The power must have just gone out."
Together, we all turned and looked at the beautiful sunshine outside and the cloudless sky. 
"Yes," I said emphatically.  "That must be it.  The power went out  due to this inclement weather!" 
Thankfully, just then all the machines started back up in unison. 
"Thank God!!"  I said, sincerely.  " I would have been very upset if I had been forced to pay a million dollars to repair the whole laundry mat."  We all returned to our laundry.
After a lengthy amount of time had gone by, I completed my laundry and started to my car.  As I passed the sign by the coin changer I paused for a moment to finish reading it.  It stated, "Do not use the  #19 and #20 dryers at the same time!!!"   Nothing else... no ominous explanation as to what might happen if one did. On my return trip to get my remaining clothes I checked to see if I had been using  #19 and #20 at the same time.....and indeed, I had.  I think I understand the reason why the sign was posted now.  On the other hand, it might have just been the weather.  Happy Friday the 13th everybody!


  1. Great idea----our little town of Romeo could
    use a laudromat! Go for it ! Love, Barbara